Establishment of Self
2005.07.02 22:21

That means if I were not suffered from measles at age 3, the awakening of self would have delayed sometime later. To have disease is always some kind of setback in our life, whilst we have disease inevitably, we are sure to have measles, rubella, mumps in some point of time in our life, I have no memory of being suffered from rubella, mumps. Maybe they must have been much much lighter than the first experience of measles.
The second big disease I suffered was total nerve breakdown. I was unable to go to school for three months. In consequence I had to repeat my first grade in my high school. But this disease was basically nothing. I mean nothing physical. Thanks to taking a three-months break, I was fully prepare for writing a couple of theses, proses, etc. It was one of the greatest occasion I ever had. Thanks to full leave from our regular work, I have never had once again the similar disease any more. Recovery done fully.
The third disease I had was pneumonia at age 28. I was working as a teacher at that time and I was somehow forced to breath air with dust of chalk, that caused eventually pneumonia. After one month of temporal retire from the job, I fully recovered. I am not sure what I could get from this suffering, ...importance of health, maybe.
The forth one was appendicitis, at age 34. Looking back on the disease I had, first one-measles helped me forming a certain self at age 3 and the second one - helped me forming a conventional self with an exteremely solid alter ego -other self, at age 16, I acqiured what is called the established self, since then my self never changes.